When a mother leaves...

When a mother leaves, she prepares her children.  She arranges care for them, makes sure they have food, ensures that they are safe, and kisses them and tells them she loves them.  She prepares them as much as she does herself for the time away.  She might tuck them into bed.  She might read them their favorite bedtime story or remind them to brush their teeth.  She might remind them to use their manners while she's gone.  She makes sure they're going to be alright and that her mind can be at ease that they're OK while she's gone.  

Recently, I learned of an acquaintance's sudden and unexpected passing.  The mother of two small children and only 28 years old.  My heart sank for her.  My heart sank for them.  Since the news, I've been unable to keep my mind from it and what lies ahead for this family.  I've tried putting myself in her shoes.  Imagining myself in heaven, my mind went to how I would worry from above about their well-being and my lack of preparation for my departure from them.  Then I realized, there can't be any worry in  heaven.  For there is no sorrow, no pain, NO suffering. 

With no time to prepare, no time to say good-bye, to give final kisses and snuggles, to ensure they had their favorite snack.  No time to tell them to use their manners...no time.  She's passed from this temporary home.  So often we refer to it as a place so inferior to heaven and yet it holds our precious loved ones for a time.  A mother's babies.  It holds a mother's sweetheart.  Her lover and best friend, her partner.  Thank God for heaven and the lack of worry. 

I'm holding my little princesses a bit tighter, snuggling a bit more, and trusting in Him.  I'm reminded we are not promised tomorrow.  Should I pass from this life tomorrow, would I have worry or doubt about my precious babies?  Regrets?  I pray God gives me strength to make the most of every single precious moment.  There's nothing in this world worth more to me than those precious girls.  I know the same would be said from any mother's lips, as I know it would have been said from this sweet acquaintance.  

I've found my thoughts and prayers drifting to her loved ones often.  I thought tonight  how many things my dear husband would learn in my absence.  I think of how often I tell him the quickest way to calm Eden's tantrums or the sneaky trick I use to get Isla to eat her meat.  I tell him their favorite things and where the band-aids are.  The special rules we've made up for the parking lot so Eden stays by my side and what Isla's babble means.  Things sometimes only a Mommy knows.  My heart thinks of what this friend knows that her sweetheart doesn't this Valentine's Day.  Maybe it's wear that favorite toy is stashed or the best hiding spot for the cookies.  Maybe it's the bedtime routine or the night time lullaby.  Only a Mommy knows... 

So hug your children tighter, kiss a little longer, and on this Valentine's day, say I love you, even if you already did.  Ask for a hug, even if you already did.  Relish the moment, even if it's a mundane one.  There's a sweetheart wishing he had one more mundane moment with his valentine tonight.