Gee, I feel as though I could have posted a hundred different things here. I'm going to settle on one though. Decisiveness.
I could have said other less vague things, I suppose like cooking or sewing. I do wish I was better at those things and there are a few things I'd like to learn to do yet, but I wish I was better at deciding things. I wish I was better at being decisive, making a decision. When you think about it, you make decisions all day long, every day. You probably make 1000 decisions. Some don't seem like decisions maybe because you do them every day, but you forget that you are choosing to do them every day. This morning, I chose to brush my teeth to my husband's delight. I choose to do this every morning. I admit, I don't always choose to floss. LOL I do choose to see a dentist who I pay to tell remind me of just how often I choose not to floss as well.
I'm not a horrible decision maker. I've made many a good decision in my day. Among many are the decision to spend my life with this wonderful godly man. I can't say I'm bad at decision making, but I always have a hard time with it. I often find myself in turmoil when trying to make a decision. A very smart woman I know recommends that you make a pros and cons list. I'm fairly certain that she learned this from a very smart set of parents that raised her. :0) My wonderfully intelligent grandmother was often quoted throughout my childhood as saying "When in doubt, don't!" There have been times when I've thought to myself "Well then I'd never do ANYTHING!" That's somewhat true! My best friend, confidant, and partner in crime couldn't possibly log the number of hours I've spent talking and telling and asking her what I should do.
Decisions decisions. We grow up as little children yearning to make them on our own. We start by throwing tantrums when we're not allowed to make them the way we want. Then we plead with our parents to let us make them. Irony bites us in the hind quarters as we then tend to lean on our parents for help in making them, when by then it's really all our own to make.
Some decisions are life-changing and easily seen as such. To attend college or training? To marry or not to marry? To have children or not to have children?
Others seem somewhat life-changing when you make them. To take the job or not? To start the business or not? To buy the house or not?
And yet others seem minimal. To go to the grocery now or later? To buy wheat or white?
Though I do wish I had been better at it earlier in life, I'd be a fool to wish my mistakes hadn't been made. As I've said before, that'd be almost to wish that the lessons hadn't been learned. God knows our hearts. He hears our cries. He knows our every thought before we think it. I've come to realize that to be a better decision maker, to be better at being decisive, I must be closer to Him. You see, if I were closer to Him some decisions would become clearer. Those times when I'm unsure, it's often because I haven't sought His will, but my own. Ouch. Enlightening.
So here's to better decisions, better love for Him.
No comments:
Post a Comment